refresh start ^^

       it's been few days since i stop blogging...now i'm back with much more refresh start..if before all i can feel n think of is love n failure..now i feel more confident n became more aware of myself....but today got no story to tell...coz i'm trying my best right now to enjoy the moment without really think what to put up in my blog  *oh...now i'm turning bloging to my diary..hehe
      tat day one of my newly found friend had a problem n he even considering suicidal...which i think is a sad n stupid moves to make..still there's nothing much that i can do other than trying to give him advice...coz i don't really know him that well,thanks god he got great friends beside him that console him n be with him throughout the painful moment of his life...he's fine now...i thinks b'coz we're young n there's a lot of raging hormone in our body,we tend to do things without careful consideration...but anyway..things end nicely^^ thank God!!

that's for now...

*next time i want to be more peotic n be more melodramatic... >_<"" trying her best

me 2day =(

my heart broke last night knowing that i couldn't get what i want...i want it so bad but lord take it away from me n i ask that 1 particular question~why me? why on earth it has to be me? i never done anything  wrongs throughout my life...then again it might have been my mistake...but still i don't deserve that.. i believe i deserve more b'cos my life don't just involve me...there's my family that counted so much on me and for me to break their heart make me think that god didn't have compassion at all...but who am i to judge...?? i believe things will get better but what if it's not-it always been like that...the moment i enjoy a sweet success trouble follow me..they always did~

i cry so much last night... and He knows~~ 

my life right now..

i'm living in uncertainty right now..not knowing where i'll be heading in the next few DAYYs...yep!!future will be decided in the next fews day..there's no words to say how scared i am...coz i know if i'm not gaining anything form this, all this struggle that i had to go through for the past 14 years is useless...nobody know it and trust me when i say nobody care about it...i promised myself if i ever get the chance i will not waste it!! NEVER!!! fighting!!

x phm aku...???

c paham ku pa ya maok gi ri ku...gago ja keja..sekejap  polah ati kita senang pasya senang2 ja ya ninggal kita...ish!! geram~ mun nya da explain sik pa la juak tok cda,mun ati nya senang cari nya kita mun ati nya tingat kat owg lain cda nya mok bz psl kita...aku manaz2 towk pun c tau psl apa...pasal nya ka..pasal diri ku pun kat nya...arrrghhh ><""....tau diri ku manaz ngan nya...dcari nya k klak cair juak ati...lyan jua kerenah miak kcik nya ya...adeehh!! c tau ku kdk ney maok handle nya...pa tah g handle diri ku mpun...nooo!!! help me!!!  huh~~sabar2 we'll just wait n c..mun bna nya main2..fine~i'll play along i just hope it will not make me look or feel like an idiot =(

 love....love....love.... =)  makes me hapie

wondering..???

i'm wondering again yesterday..have to let it out today...if i'm not a human nor i am an animal i would like to a cupid..huh!!then i can set up people =)....yesterday something came up to me..what if i can't be with him who would i want then to replace me..n i can only think of one person..one of my best friend..as much as i think she be the perfect 
match,there's still a sense of jealousy...huh!!i can't let her be with him...nooooooo...i have faith in me..i'm sure i can do it.
..right now i can't think about that there's only 2 days left on knowing where my future will heading to..i pray to god that he hear my prayer and fulfill it...amen 

crush...???

    first time i saw him when i was 14 years old..guess where i saw him...nope.. not on the street nor at church or in school,it was on tv...yeah~i know what you're thinking rite now...it happened to a lot of people-have a crush on celebrity or tv personality...but i know it's not...well first let me tell you that i'm a very confident but don't really show how confident i am to others people...i know i will be with him some day i just don't know when it will happen....
    my 1st time doin blog n already talking bout him..hikhik,sory if this blog not as interesting as other..just new mah...haha
    
  *will tis things work..ermm my 3,4,5,6 o 7th attempt...hiihii ^^